Tuesday, May 01, 2007

Beware the Googly-Eyed Bitch

We've all been a Googly-Eyed Bitch at some point or another.

Now we need to learn to recognize it:

You spend time with someone and everything is going great

You hang out, talk, party whatever

You're friends.

Pals, amigos, do all kinds of shit together bosom-buddies.

Then one day it kinda hits you.

I don't just like this person, I LIKE-like them.

LIKE-like them the way kittens frolicking in flowery meadows makes moms happy.

Which is LOTS.

But Wait.

I wonder if they LIKE-like me too...

Let's say they do.

You start changing the way you act around that person

You get Googly-Eyed.

It's all sweet-smelling roses, a skip in your step, and shit like that

Constant text messages and phone calls and emails and chatting etcetc

There are Whenever There is You moments...

And all kinds of ewtsy cutesy bullshit.

Sure they LIKE-like you back, but what if they don't LIKE-like you the way you LIKE-like them?!

Then you become a

Do this, do that, pleeaassee?

And what do you do?

You fuckin DO IT.

Cuz they said to.

And you LIKE-like them.

You look at them the way an alcoholic looks at a bottle through the window...

You've become a Googly-Eyed Bitch.

And they know it.

So they use you a bit . . .

But it gets boring quickly.


Wait a minute.

Who the fuck are you?!

You're acting all different...not yourself.

You're not the person I thought I LIKE-liked!

You're a Googly-Eyed Bitch!

Holy shit!!

You're right.

And then it all fades and you go back to being friends.

Do yourself a favor and stop Googly-Eyed Bitch Syndrome.

I did.


Leafs Fan said...

That cat wants me doesn't he?

Spicy Little Pi said...


but look out, that face has SLUT written all over it...

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