Hot Sex to the Third Degree

Since this post is decidedly un-sexy, I had to use a sexy title...

Last night, after pouring over the Rolling Stone cover article over dinner I got to thinking.

Britney, you bitch, you're just having fun with everyone.

Then instead of reading the entire magazine and doing fuck-all on a Monday night I decided to be Productive

So at 6:30 ish I decide to re-arrange my living room!

It's been 6 months since I moved in...time for a change

First up: Move my two bookcases into the other room.

Note: I have LOTS of books.

After I finish that, the room already looks bigger.

Neat.

OK, time to move the TV and stuff.

I have an extra coffee table from IKEA that was small enough to be used in my dorm room about 7 years ago...I kept it for whatever reason

It's about the same height as the TV stand...

Being the Stubborn Independent Woman that I am, I figured: I can do this, I've done it before!

So I unhook the TV and slide er onto the old coffee table.

Next, drag the stands with all the dvds and electronic stuff and speakers over to the new location

Turn on stereo.

OK, now the moving of the TV.

In hindsight, I should have moved the shag area rug first....

So I'm dragging the table across the floor, with the TV on top of it...

Then I notice that the legs on one side are starting to lean

And then crack

Hm.

Slowly....slowly moving the table with the TV...

I get it almost to where I can move it on top of the stand.

And then the table breaks.

Falls on my already bruised right foot,

I stub my toe on the sharp end of a screw sticking out of the leg...

And the TV slides into my left leg.

God Damnit.

After struggling with it a bit more, I resign to leave it where it is.

I get the broken table out of the way and move the rest of my things around, vacuum blahblahblah

After a bit I notice my leg is kinda sore.

It's tender and a couple of bumps are forming where the TV crashed into me.

As you can see from the picture, the TV is not a light beast.

(I slaved away as a hostess at Perkins for a month to pay for it 5 years ago...)

It's a 32" Toshiba tube.

Heavy.

I call my upstairs neighbor...no answer, I leave this rambling message, call another friend...no answer again.

Screw it.

Curious, I roll up my pant leg...

Holy Shit!

I bruised the fuck out of my leg.

Surprisingly it didn't hurt that much.

I have a high tolerance for pain.

Then I watched the news on the floor.

I totally kicked my own ass.

The worst part?

It's hard to cross my legs the way I prefer.

The best?

Showing off my sweet bruise and grossing people out.