Wednesday, August 02, 2006

what happened to the birds and the bees?

There are things young eyes should never see.

Like late night HBO.

And parents having sex.

Being the lucky gal that I am, I was subjected to both. (one voluntarily, the other...not so much)


When I was in the 7th grade, I watched a movie.

But not just any movie.

It was called Blown Away.

Not the Tommy Lee Jones Blown Away...this one was, um, graphic.

Like the lone commenter on the IMDb page, 'I still remember it quite vividly...'

SEX and Explosions.

I was fascinated.

I'm sure it's an awful movie, but I was 11. Check it out.

Another notable childhood moment, which also happened around that time...

A Clockwork Orange.

A Masterpiece, but Pi hasn't seen this movie since.

Why my dad thought it a good idea to show his 11 yr old daughter a fucked up Kubrick flick, Pi will never know.

It doesn't stop there:

Once, while we were watching Other People's Money, Danny DeVito's character says:

We make passionate love the rest of the night. The first one that comes, loses.

At which point Pi asked a question:

Come? Go where? What is he talking about, dad?

Imagine an overweight mexican sitting in a white plastic with pea green cushion bar chair, spin around, with his hands clasped behind his head and a strange smile across his face...


An explanation for 'to come' ensued. . .

My mother had a different way to explain such things...

Could these be the foundations upon which Pi founded her super-libido?

Is this how Pi came to 'ooze sex' as a few people have put it?

Hmmm not sure about that...

Aahhh the shining moments of childhood.

In the back of this pic you can clearly see my 'art.'

The green blob is an ogre wielding a dagger chasing a unicorn.

I'm totally working . . .can't you tell?

there. a recent Pi pic. I feel I need to redeem myself after those dweeboid pix from you bitches better comment!


Spicy Little Pi said...

erf. i've been asked to elaborate on the 'parents having sex'

i was wandering down the stairs when i heard something...

a muffled noise, some blankets and sheets moving, i leaned over the railing and looked straight into my parents' room...i was scared...

those noises didn't seem right.


a few quick movements and covers they were doing something wrong...

i was too young to know what i really saw at the time.

but i know now.

wish i didn't.

Uncle Buck said...

That's it? come on Pi, your slipping...

outlaw-pitt said...

spicy ur cute!

Spicy Little Pi said...

thx outlaw :)

UB's flexing his anality.

it can't always be perfect!

Tayster said...

Wow, pi, you put the "hot" in "hottie".

That is all.